Guess what happened...?
I'm awful at this surprise business.
About 2 months ago I drunkenly told everyone that since I was little it's been my dream to be thrown a surprise party. Unfortunately no matter how hard I wished, I'd never even been to a surprise party let alone been the special guest at one. That was until last night.
Meet the Tricky Two.
You all know Cat but if you don't know Abi, she's the sneakiest little housemate you've ever laid eyes on. Between them and the fact my birthday was still a couple of days away, I was led to believe that I was going to have a the most normal Tuesday.
The night before Cat text me asking if I was up for the cinema. We organised when and where we'd meet up and settled on The Grand Budapest Hotel.
The next morning, Abi nonchalantly asked me if I had any plans for the day. Thinking I was going to have a particularly good day spending the evening at the pictures, little did I know what the gruesome twosome and the rest of the gang had up their sleeves.
In the end, I happened to have a particularly shocking morning involving some casual racism during lectures so when 4pm rolled around a double dose of Cat and Wes Anderson was exactly what I needed.
When we eventually made it back to mine, I was still oblivious to the stitch up. Walking through the door I could smell delicious food and noticed a little hand briefly sticking out of the kitchen but assumed Abi was cooking up a storm. In hindsight, that was my biggest clue as the microwave is Abi's best friend.
As I came up to the kitchen I looked down to see Astri crouched on the floor. Now Astri's a regular in our house so I instantly thought her and Abi were messing about and were going to jump out on us in the dark but within a split second the room was filled with light, poppers and people yelling surprise!
I wish someone had filmed it because I don't think I'll ever be able to recreate the face that I pulled. I have never been so unsuspecting in my entire life.
Once I'd choked back the tears and stopped shaking, Abi explained that it wasn't just any old party, it was a freaking BURGER PARTY! The rules were that everyone would make a burger and I would get the first bite of each before reviewing them all and picking a winner. With no further ado, I was presented with Astri's entry.
I wasn't told what was in it, only that I must have 3 bites before I could put it down. At first it tasted like a Macca's Chicken Mayo. But by the second mouthful my eyes started to water a little. After managing through the final bite, I was allowed to open it up and inspect the filling. Mayo and chilli. Chopped fresh chills. Hundreds of them.
Now I can handle the heat but even I had to take a moment to chill out my mouth.
Just look at those watery eyes!
After that assault of the tastebuds, I nosed about seeing what other delicacies were on offer.
I found a whole range of burger essentials and two of the most delicious looking cakes I had ever seen.
All credit goes to the wonderful Mathilda and her incredible cake baking talents.
I spent the rest of the evening moving round everyone thanking them profusely and making sure that they knew I'd had absolutely no idea! It beats me how they all kept it a secret for so long - makes you wonder what else they're all hiding, hey!
And don't forget all the burgers I had to try!
Kate presented me with her speciality burger featuring cheese, carrot and hot chips. It was surprisingly tasty although the carrots were a touch to hard and would have been better if they had been grated first; but that's only a minor flaw.
Next up was Andi's turn to build a burger. This boy is naughty and so was his burger. He combined feta, chips, salad and lashings of mayo before topping it off with an iced donut. Luckily enough, being lads, him and Adam polished it off before I was made to take a bite. Still, I'll give them credit for creativity.
I swiftly moved on to Mathilda's fair of cheese, ketchup and mayo. A truly great combo.
The next bite was an interesting one. These mini veggy burgers came from Angelica who'd branched out from the classic burger bun and opted savoury scones instead. And she pulled it off - they were unexpected and delicious. Again, she gets extra points for creativity. And I mean, just look at that empty plate, they must have been good!
Natalie was next with a classic cheeseburger, aptly named 'The Classic'. Sometimes less is more and simple done well is so much better than fancy done badly. Within one chew this was already on my favourites list. The cocktail stick presentation won her some extra credit too.
The final contestant was Abi with her 'Salad Burger'. As you can tell it was laden with salad which encased the burger and was doused in Italian dressing. She was worried it was too salady and normally I would agree with her but this was delicious. The salad made the burger feel fresh and light whilst the bun soaked up all the tasty dressing without becoming soggy.
All the burgers I tried were delicious in their own way but I think I can narrow it down to a draw between 'The Salad Burger' and 'The Classic'. You can fight it out between yourselves, girls.
After all that deliciousness I got seriously into the party mood and spent the rest of the evening decorating myself and pulling out some hideously embarrassing old skool dance moves, with Steph, to the cracking 90s playlist pumping through the house. Who remembers the Ketchup Song?! Or Ooh Ee Ooh Ah Ah Ting Tang Walla Walla Bing Bang?! Whoever sorted the music should become a full time DJ!
And then the lights went down and it was time for me to make a wish (or two).
No-one had heard of the good luck charm of cutting the cake half way through with one foot on the table and screaming when you reach the middle so, not wanting to embarrass myself further, I dived straight in and we set to gorging ourselves on delicious cake.
I want to thank everyone who came and made last night one of the best evenings of my life. I also want to extend a special thank you to my main gals + Steph who organised the whole thing despite all their stresses and deadlines and god knows what else. In the immortal words of S Club 7, I never had a dream come true until the day that I found you.
So yeah, thanks. You should all go join MI6 or the CIA or something.